Friday's 5 minute poem--04/22/05

In honor of all BMW drivers

"Beemers"

There is nothing like a Beemer
A real drive-ING machine!
It vrooms along the freeway,
So fast it makes you scream!

The clutch goes in, the shifter thrusts,
Directly up the gears,
As smooth as silk, the engine whines,
And allays all your fears,

That going fast is dangerous,
It seems so effortless.
Until you start to skid a bit,
And then you're in a mess!

Thank God the Beemer's built so well,
It skid and then it crashed!
It's fortunate your belt was on,
Your face could have been smashed!

It certainly was fun to know,
That Beemer was so fast!
But driving up to it's top speed,
Made it come in dead last!

Mark Worden
04/22/2005

Beware the "Ides of April"?--a poem

"March, July, October, May
The Nones are on the seventh day"

Anon. (Roman?)


Beware the Ides of April?

The fifteenth day of April,
Is not like March's "ides".
It's from the Roman Calendar,
Once used both far and wide.

"Beware the Ides of March!",
Warned Caesar of demise.
It's said he got his months mixed up,
Confusion proved unwise.

Rome ruled most all the ancient world.
Taught Latin, math, and such.
Yet counted dates most cumbersome,
Which proved to be to much!

The "kalends" fell upon the first,
The "nones" most on the fifth,
The "ides" fell eight days later,
Except the "nones" would shift!

In March, July, October, May,
The "nones" for some good reason,
Would fall upon the seventh day,
No matter what the season!

Eight days in March beyond the "nones",
Was "ides" to ancient Rome.
The fifteenth was the date to fear,
When Caesar left his home.

In April when the "nones" appeared,
Twas five days past day ones,
And "ides" fell on the thirteenth day,
Eight days beyond the "nones".

Well, I'm asea, perhaps it's so,
That Caesar was confused.
Forgot the little poem that kept,
The "nones" prop-er-ly used.

Mark Worden
April 15, 2005

Friday 4/15--the ides of April?

Thanks to Shakespeare, even most children know that Julius Caeser was not attentive to the warning he got regarding his predicted demise, "Beware the ides of March!". And we all know that the ides of March is the 15th!

Since today is the 15th of April, for some reason I wondered why no one ever calls the 15th of other months "The Ides" So I asked "Jeeves".

And of course, In Julius's world the Roman Calendar ruled the days and years, which was different that the Julian Calendar now used to mark the date.

In the Roman Calendar there were three dates which had names each month by which the calender was calculated:

1. The Kalends: always fell on the 1st of the month.

2. The Nones: always fell on the 5th of the month except--March, July, October, May
The Nones are on the 7th day.

3. The Ides: always fell 8 days after the Nones.

So since the Ides fall 8 days after the Nones and the Nones in March fall on the 7th day after the Kalends, then the 15th of March is the Ides. Simple, huh!

In April, the Nones is on the 5th day after the Kalends and the Ides is 8 days later or on the 13th.

The Romans expressed the date in accordance with its relationship before one of these three named days, e.g., April 15 is 16 days before the Kalends of May. March 14 is 1 day before the Ides of March. April 2nd is 3 days before the Nones of April.

No wonder the Roman Empire fell. They got confused and tangled up in their calendar, and ended up at the wrong place at the wrong time. I'm sure that is also why Latin is no longer the dominent language of the world.

So, happy 16 days before the Kalends of May!

Biking haiku #9

mountain snows melting
spring loves building nests of twigs
ski lifts filled with bikes

3/25/05--An Easter Poem--Of Sorts

It's Easter Sunday!
Time to hunt for eggs!
Go to Church!
Wear funny hats!

A Christian celebration,
Like Christmas!
Commercialized,
By the Easter Bunny!

A holiday for everyone,
Who likes colored eggs,
Baskets full of jelly beans,
And honey baked ham!